Life is full of limitations — there are only 24 hours in a day, roughly 365 days in a year, and a finite number of years that we will live. But that should not deter you from pursuing your desires, says writer Oliver Burkeman. Burkeman, a former journalist and time management researcher, publishes a twice-monthly newsletter about productivity, mortality, the power of limits, and building a meaningful life. He is also the author of the New York Times bestselling self-help book, “Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals.” His recent work, “Meditations for Mortals,” discusses how one can accept limitations in life and use them to their advantage.
The list of aspirations we hope to achieve in life often surpasses what we can realistically accomplish, Burkeman explains. We will “always be vulnerable to unforeseen disasters or distressing emotions.” These are simply the limitations of our human experience. However, he asserts that “when you give up the unwinnable struggle to do everything, that’s when you can start pouring your finite time and attention into a handful of things that truly count.”
How to Embrace Limitations
1. You Can Face Consequences
In every situation, Burkeman notes, there are always consequences: “It’s in the nature of being finite that every choice comes with some sort of consequences, because at any instant, you can only pick one path and must deal with the repercussions of not picking any of the others.” When making decisions, even exciting ones like a new job offer, you often have to sacrifice other appealing options. Burkeman encourages seeing this as a source of freedom rather than a burden.
2. Befriend What Scares You
Avoiding fear can seem safe, but Burkeman suggests that it is better to confront it. He references a Zen monk who advocated for befriending your fears. “Confronting the situation is the only way to do something about it,” he states. This means embracing fears rather than running from them—finding less intimidating ways to engage with what frightens you.
3. Do Things ‘Dailyish’
While striving for larger goals through daily practice is beneficial, Burkeman warns against the trap of perfection. He advocates for a “dailyish” approach which offers flexibility; it allows for a plan that accommodates busy periods rather than demanding perfection every day. “The point isn’t to spend your life serving rules. The point is for the rules to serve life,” he asserts.
4. Set Quantity Goals
Burkeman posits that focusing on quantity may be more effective than quality in some cases. By setting a quantity goal, such as writing for a specific amount of time daily, the pressure to produce high-quality work diminishes. “A quantity goal puts you in the driver’s seat,” he says. “Instead of hoping you produce something good, you know you will produce something.”
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